Here Come the Tears

This is definitely going to be my most depressing/weepy post yet so take it or leave it. I am back in New York but the transition is harder than I had anticipated. About a week ago in Ghana, we had this re-entry workshop that dealt with our return to the states and how to adjust. At the time I thought it was the most pointless way to spend 1 hour and a waste of my time. The only thing that stayed with me is the woman who was leading the workshop saying that if adjusting to life in Ghana was very easy then re-adjusting when you go home is going to be hard. I believe that now.

Right now I'm listening to all the music that reminds me of amazing memories in Ghana and crying. I can't really help it. In the past 36 hours, I have laughed and cried a ridiculous amount. I know it's going to be better with time but right now, time has not yet come and I'm still sad. I miss Ghana so much more than I was prepared for.

Since I last wrote, things have been very interesting and so much fun. This past week, I think I got a total of 10 hours of sleep b/c there was so much that I wanted to do that I stayed out until the sun came up. My last weekend in Ghana started on Thursday with our last quiz night at Champs, during which we lost but we stayed until late having great conversations. Then a group of us moved onto Afrodisiac for the last Thursday dancehall night. It was fun but we ended up getting home at 4am, which was earlier than we had anticipated. Friday we made up for it by going first to Celsbridge for a couple drinks, then onto Champs karaoke night for some more drinks and to say goodbye to the ppl we usually hang out with there. The owner of Champs took me aside and told me that of all the international students that he's seen come and go from all over the world, this semester's NYU students are by far the best that have come to Ghana. It was one of the nicest moments and a great way to leave. Then from Champs we went to The Office and danced there for awhile. After The Office we went to Tantra where some of us ended up dancing until 5am and from there we went to Afrodisiac where we stayed until sunrise. From there, about 5 of us drove to a nearby hotel (one of the nicest in Ghana) and got an AMAZING brunch, like omelets, Belgian waffles, bacon, potatoes, cinnamon rolls, donuts, fruit, french bread, etc. Oh man, it was amazing. Then we finally got home at 9am Saturday morning. Friday was by far one of my favorite nights in Ghana. So Saturday was our last full day in Ghana and I spend it by helping take some of the orphans to the beach and we spent the day swimming and hanging out. I don't think there could have been a better way to spend the day.





At night it poured, which for awhile didn't look good but then it cleared up and a group of us went to Heritage Indian restaurant for dinner then onto our party at the Office. One of the owners, Abdul, was nice enough to throw us a party on our last night, open bar, music, etc. It ended up being a really interesting night with many ups and downs but overall it was fun.



After The Office, we went to Afro, stayed for a little bit and then got home around 5:45. So needless to say the last weekend in Ghana was intense. Sunday was full of last minute errands, lots of sweating and packing and crying from the moment we left our compound until now. At the airport was one of the most tearful scenes as the first group of us left to go on the plane and left our friends at the bottom of the escalator. Still crying during take off, I finally slept for 8 hours until I arrived in Amsterdam. Once there, 3 of us went into the city and explored until we went back to the airport for our final flight to New York.







Even though I know I will see the NYU students in New York, it's not the same. I keep thinking of all the amazing memories I had this semester and can easily say Ghana was the best experience of my life. I believe that everything happens for a reason and I know there was a reason I couldn't get into the Paris spring '06 program and decided to go to Ghana instead. It was one of the best decisions of my life and even though I have certain regrets about some things in Ghana, they were individual events that in no way made my stay in Ghana bad. I also think I grew from the experience because I let myself become vulnerable and in end the end, I felt hurt by some of it and some of it paid off from me opening myself up. So now it's back to New York where I have to start looking for a job and then it's onto my next traveling experience in Paris. Right now I can't be excited about any of it because I'm still depressed about leaving Ghana but I know that by the time Paris comes around I'll be ready. I think back to the time in December when I was leaving New York and thinking that maybe Ghana was a bad idea and I was terrified of going, not knowing what to expect. Looking back it seems so ridiculous to even question if I was going to like Ghana since I ended up having the time of my life. So I know that in the end my next experience will be good.

I keep thinking of how to describe Ghana when people ask my how it was. I feel like just saying "Oh it was amazing" cannot suffice for what actually happened. So I guess when describing my experience in Ghana, I can only say it's one of those things that cannot be conveyed in words but in memories, emotions and people.

I'm going to miss living in the same room with 3 other girls and every night feeling like a sleepover, my house of girls and our dance parties, nightlife in Accra, which is the best nightlife I've ever experienced, quiz nights on Thursdays, spades nights on Tuesdays, bike riding and having children call out to me, arguing with taxi drivers over the price, the fan ice men who ride around on bicycles, having a rain dance during a Ghanaian storm, the foam party in Togo, riding around on motorcycles in Togo, traveling like I've never traveled before to Timbuktu with my girls, double dutch outside at 2am, mornings-after in my room and the 3 or 4 guests who came to visit at 7am, celebrating my 21st birthday in Ghana, dancing with the guy I liked and even dancing with the ones I didn't, going to the famous soccer player's ridiculous house for a party, going out as The Divas, playing football with the locals on the beach, teaching workshops to young children about HIV, AIDS and anti-discrimination, modeling for a great cause, riding camels in the Sahara desert, jumping into the Volta river, searching for the perfect egg sandwich, especially after a night of too much partying, Ghanaian music like Aso and Otoolege, fun nights at The Office, Tantra, Boom, Afro, Champs, Celsbridge and Bamboo, speaking french in francophone countries, buying lots of African souvenirs, and laughing every single day of my life.

And when I get the chance, you better believe I'm going back to Ghana. Trust.